Remembering a good friend on Day 28.

My friend Karen told me a shocking news two days ago but I couldn't believe it, rather, I refused to believe it. She said that someone had sent her a text message that our friend Lorna has passed away. I've known Lorna for seven years, we worked together in ADI Telecoms back when I was only 16. Karen and she met at my wedding 3 years ago and I know they've been in-touch since.

This morning, that news has been confirmed by my bestmate, Sarah. She said that Lorna died of a blockage in her vein(s). She is only 28, and that's way too young to die. She's been through so much though. She's been doing a job she hates so much for the past five years, but she stayed because her family needed her to have a job. I feel absolutely guilty because she had wanted to see me in March, just before I left The Philippines. I said I'd come see her with James , but I never found the time to. I always sucked at keeping in-touch with my mates. They'd text me, and I'd usually read it half-asleep (being in a time zone all my own) and completely forget about it when I wake up. I never got to text her to tell her I was leaving either, and I failed to pop in at her workplace which is about ten minutes away from where I lived. She's great in keeping in-touch though. She'd always text me just to ask how things are. She'd even come around my house to see me. That's one thing I wish I were, but I just really suck at keeping in-touch. Maybe I don't really try, which sucks even worse.

She had a much much tougher life than me, and I suppose God knew when to stop. To the people one leaves behind, death is a punishment. But personally, I think that death is the ultimate reward for all the sacrifices and hardship we overcome in this world. I don't think dying is something to be scared of, every battle is won in the end when your soul is free of everything, and you get ultimate peace of heart and mind. But for the people one leaves behind, death is a curse.

The last time I saw Lorna was at my wedding. She tried to get a hold of me many times. I think she needed me. But how was I to know? She's always laughing and joking even in her text messages. I wish I knew what lies behind people's smiles... Because I know, that even mine, often deceive people. I just really wish I could've been there for her. And now, I can't even be at her funeral because I'm eight thousand miles away from home. It's when prayers are all I got, and faith that Lorna is in a better place now.

I'd like to send my most sincere condolences to the Mallari family. I'm so sorry for your loss.